Sunday, January 24, 2010
The Anti-Leftist Grogger
1. The anti-Leftist “Grogger”
By Steven Plaut
For months now, every Friday in Zion has seen noisy screaming violent leftist rioters attacking Israeli soldiers, engaging in hooliganism, and breaking the law. The thugs are a mixture of foreign pro-terror “anarchists” that Israel foolishly lets into the country, joined by some members of Israel’s own “Leftists for the Extermination of Israel.” For months they have demonstrated in the West Bank towns of Bil’in and Nil’in to show their support for terrorists mass murdering Israeli Jews. They oppose Israel having a security fence because it makes it harder for the suicide bombers to reach Israeli children.
These past few weeks they have shifted their noisy activities to the Simon the Righteous neighborhood in Jerusalem. The demonstrators demand that no Jews be allowed to move into the homes they legally own in that neighborhood because the neighborhood “belongs” to Arabs. They closely resemble the Ku Klux Klan marchers who try to prevent black folks from moving into neighborhoods where they “do not belong.”
Now while I personally would prefer loading the noisy violent protesters onto a one-way bus for Gaza, or perhaps a one-way plane for Somalia, Israel insists on dealing with these thugs as “protesters.” But now Israeli science and the ingenuity of the “Yiddishe Kopf” have come up with a new weapon that can be used to disburse these noisy cheerleaders for terror.
Israel plans to fight their noise … with noise.
That is correct. Israel is about to take a lesson from Jewish history and adapt that weapon of mass destruction that we all use every year against Haman! Just in time for upcoming Purim, Israel is going to employ an anti-leftist Purim grogger. And it really works!
Popular Science magazine on January 19, 2010 reported that Israel has developed a new “weapon” against terrorist cheerleaders and against pro-terror “Solidarity” rioters. It is a “sonic cannon.” It makes loud noises that sound like the sonic booms of jets. It was developed by PDT Agro, a small company in Israel that had been previously building “sound cannons” that scare away pests from Israeli farms. The new invention will be used to scare away leftist pests trying to assist Palestinian mass murdering genocidal terrorists.
The report in Popular Science is a delicious take-off on the science fiction classic “Dune,” in which the desert fighters (called “fedayeen,” of all things) battle the barbarians using sound weapons: “A desert people have developed a new weapon that uses sound instead of bullets. But this time, it will be used to control crowds instead of fighting giant worms or devious members of House Harkonnen. The Israeli Defense Ministry has contracted for the production of sonic-boom stun-guns called ‘Thunder Generator cannons,’ which they hope to use in crowd-control situations.”
The new contraption fights noise with noise as a sort of way to fight fire with fire. Here is the Popular Science explanation: “The weapon runs on LPG, a common cooking gas, which mixes with oxygen to generate powerful bursts of sound. Each sound burst lasts around 300 milliseconds, and generates a shockwave that travels from the cannon at almost six times the speed of sound.”
You realize what all this means? If Israel has invented ONE cure for leftist hooliganism, just imagine what could lie ahead? Perhaps an anti-leftism pill, which – when swallowed – raises the IQ by 50 points? How about a special rubber bullet that electronically hones in on marijuana? How about a special TASER that can only be discharged against the unbathed?
Be that as it may, this new real invention represents a giant scientific step forward for Israel. As you may recall, Israel had been using Pepe Le Pew to help control the violent hooligans and anarcho-fascist thugs who pogrom weekly in the West Bank against Israel’s security fence. A while back it was reported that Israel has decided to keep them in line by using “skunk bombs.” These “bombs,” actually just a canister spray, apparently are so smelly that even an anarchist who has not bathed in 18 months is capable of being offended and repulsed by the odor. The Jerusalem Post reported: ‘The skunk bomb is a foul-smelling liquid which is sprayed on the rioters. “The smell is so strong that people flee immediately.” Some news reports are claiming that the spray smells remarkably like a mixture of, well, Number One and Number Two. At least one web site referred to it as Zionist Death Dung.
I am wondering whether the new sound cannon can be combined with other forms of anti-leftist music. We all recall the Apocalypse Now movie, where the choppers come in firing while playing Wagner music. So why not wheel in the new Israeli anti-leftist sound cannons while loudspeakers play loud Shlomo Carlebach songs in the background, or perhaps even Avraham Fried singing Chassidic songs?
And then we can all just sit back and watch the leftist varmints scurry!!
(Full news story here: http://www.popsci.com/technology/article/2010-01/israeli-sonic-cannon-control-rioters-scare-birds)
